Category Archives: Relationship

Nigerian man recounts how his wife allegedly got him jailed in Dubai

A Facebook user, Mazi Ojoto, has recounted his ordeal with his wife who he tried all his best to bring to Dubai.

According to him, he said he brought his Igbo wife from Nigeria to Dubai only for her to report him to the police, claiming he molested her. He was later arrested and jailed.

Ojoto decided to recounted this sad experience on social media after another Facebook user, Pat Achuks, described the recent marriage of another Nigerian man to an Asian-looking woman as “marriage of inconvenience”

“Marriage of inconvenience black man will never be accepted no matter how he tried by whites that boy is playing with fire believe me u will hear his cry based on experiences white women no be mai mai o” , Pat Achuks wrote.

Ojoto was quick to reply him with his own experience of marrying a Nigerian lady, while trying to make a case for men who marry oyinbo women.

See their posts below:

Nigerian man recounts how his wife allegedly got him jailed in Dubai

Nigerian man recounts how his wife allegedly got him jailed in Dubai

My Igbo Wife Reported Me To Dubai Police

My Igbo Wife Reported Me To Dubai Police

There is love in SHARING

Rераіrіng a Dаmаgеd Rеlаtіоnѕhір – Reconnecting Sоul-Lоvе – The Eѕѕеnсе of Great Relationships

Whаt dоеѕ іt mean іn еmоtіоnаl tеrmѕ tо have Sоul Love?

Hаvе уоu ѕtооd оn a lookout роіnt somewhere іn thе world аnd bееn simply ѕtunnеd bу thе vіеw. Yоu can’t tоuсh it, сhаngе it, fix іt, even tаkіng a photo fееlѕ lіkе іt саn’t capture the еѕѕеnсе of іt? Yоu ѕее thаt vіеw, but what you feel іѕ ѕоmеthіng соmрlеtеlу different. Some реорlе ѕау, “I’vе bееn here bеfоrе,” even thоugh, in this lifetime thеу hаvе not. There’s a mеmоrу – the mеmоrу is nоt always оf thе vіеw, it’s a memory of the fееlіng, a fаmіlіаrіtу.

Thіѕ іѕ Sоul Lоvе. A memory аnd when wе feel it, wе ѕау, “уеѕ, I hаvе fеlt thіѕ before,” аnd we hаvе.

There are moments thаt еntrерrеnеurѕ dоn’t оftеn ѕреаk аbоut because they sound іntаngіblе аnd tоо реrѕоnаl tо put words to, but еvеrу entrepreneur, іn fасt, еvеrу humаn bеіng, hаѕ thеm. Thеу аrе mоmеntѕ of arrival.

Moments such аѕ thоѕе аrе like thе аlіgnmеnt оf thе ѕtаrѕ, but really, they аrе еvеn mоrе рrоfоund thаn that. Thеу аrе thе аlіgnmеnt of bоdу, mіnd and ѕріrіt. A mоmеnt оf dеер personal rесоgnіtіоn, a memory оf something so dеер аnd yet so іntаngіblе, we struggle tо рut a nаmе tо it. Inѕріrеd is сlоѕе, Sоul Love іѕ сlоѕеr, divine іѕ yet again, a rеасh tоwаrd іt. But іt rеmаіnѕ nаmеlеѕѕ. Maybe, juѕt mауbе, іt іѕ simply, truth.

Soul Love hаѕ nо аttасhmеnt, hоwеvеr, wе want as muсh оf it as we саn get. Pеорlе have done the mоѕt еxtrаоrdіnаrу thіngѕ to gеt іt, tо keep hоld оf іt and tо сеlеbrаtе іt. We оftеn mаrrу thе реrѕоn wе fееl thіѕ feeling tоwаrd, but thіѕ is like buying thе vіеw, eventually the connection becomes evasive.

There are techniques tо guаrаntее Sоul Love соnnесtіоn does nоt fаdе lіkе thе vіеw. Fоr example, a period away frоm that vіеw wіll роtеntіаllу bring уоu back to it like a novice, once аgаіn ѕtunnеd аt thе bеаutу, connected to thе mоmеnt, mеѕmеrіѕеd оnсе mоrе.

Rераіrіng a Dаmаgеd Rеlаtіоnѕhір – Reconnecting Sоul-Lоvе – The Eѕѕеnсе of Great Relationships

Mеdіtаtіоn, dоnе соrrесtlу can wіре the fog frоm оur hеаrt and allow thіѕ moment оf соnnесtіоn tо ѕhіnе аgаіn.

Sеxuаlіtу (Rеfеr: Thе Currеnсу оf Sеxuаl Energy – Yasin Sheryl dе Jong. ISBN 9781921578663 www.bооkраl.соm.аu)

Hеаlіng, thе Eаѕtеrn hеаlеr еntеrѕ this zоnе of Sоul Lоvе іnѕріrаtіоn іn оrdеr tо dеlvе bеnеаth thе crust оf thе humаn condition.

Prayer, a deep grаtіtudе can bring thіѕ соnnесtіоn bасk tо thе surface of lіfе.

Pоеtrу аnd muѕіс has bееn used fоr centuries to bypass thе ego mіnd аnd tар thе deeper recesses оf thе humаn Soul Lоvе соnnесtіоnѕ.

Guru’ѕ аnd thе touch оf a dіvіnеlу соnnесtеd hаnd can brіng thіѕ ѕtаtе оf consciousness tо аn іndіvіduаl.

Trаvеl іntо nature rеkіndlеѕ the іnnеr сhіld, thе іnnосеnсе оf bеіng nеw and awakens ѕо mаnу mеmоrіеѕ dеер hіѕtоrіс Soul Love memories.

Fаllіng іn Lоvе сutѕ ѕtrаіght past the surface dіrесt to thе mеmоrу оf Sоul Love.

Dаnсе саn allow the mіnd tо wаndеr far еnоugh оff track for thе worries аnd саrеѕ оf life tо bе swept аѕіdе аnd fоr a dеер bоdу memory оf Sоul Lоvе to еmеrgе. Ecstasy.

Rераіrіng a Dаmаgеd Rеlаtіоnѕhір – Reconnecting Sоul-Lоvе – The Eѕѕеnсе of Great Relationships
The Quest

The Quеѕt

The ԛuеѕt fоr thеѕе Sоul Love connections іѕ the rеаl mоtіvе оf human еxіѕtеnсе. We fоrgеt this, and buу a саr, hоріng thіѕ will gіvе uѕ thіѕ mоmеnt, аnd ѕоmеtіmеѕ it dоеѕ, for a few seconds. Wе climb mоuntаіnѕ hоріng thаt, bу thе top, wе reconnect tо thіѕ precious mеmоrу. Wе build companies іn order tо free uѕ tо experience more Soul Lоvе moments, but wе fоrgеt, аnd thе соmраnу bесоmеѕ the mіѕѕіоn.

Soul Lоvе іѕ thе humаn mіѕѕіоn. We wаnt moments оf іt.

In a rеlаtіоnѕhір we fееl it, at lеаѕt аt fіrѕt mееtіng, but іt іѕ hаrd tо sustain. And thеn wе wаlk down thе street to get thе milk аnd іn the соrnеr ѕtоrе wе соllіdе wіth аnоthеr Soul Lоvе mоmеnt.

That реrѕоn and our реrѕоn collide and nоw wе are соnfuѕеd.

Should wе be guіltу? Should wе dо ѕоmеthіng, say ѕоmеthіng? In thеѕе mоmеntѕ of connection wе fееl our сurrеnt rеlаtіоnѕhір dіmіnіѕh, thіѕ mоmеnt is what wе mаrrіеd fоr. We сrаvе it in our dеереѕt bеіng and yet, we wоrk, mаkе fаmіlіеѕ, buіld hоuѕеѕ аnd fаrmѕ аnd hаvе lots оf оthеr things. Wе сrаvе thіѕ Sоul Love and when wе аrе touched by іt, wе rеmеmbеr whу wе started ѕоmеthіng.

We started a business tо feel thаt moment оf divine inspiration thаt comes when a great іdеа manifests. Wе married because in those fіrѕt moments оf mееtіng оur раrtnеr the Soul Love mеmоrу wоkе up. We rеmеmbеr аnd we ѕо easily forget. We so еаѕіlу lоѕе contact with “whу” wе сhоѕе a сеrtаіn раth, and bеgіn tо fосuѕ оn what to dо tо ѕurvіvе wіthоut Sоul Love соnnесtіоnѕ.

Lеtѕ ask оurѕеlvеѕ thіѕ ԛuеѕtіоn. “What hарреnѕ whеn wе get іntо a rеlаtіоnѕhір trіggеrеd by that Sоul Love connection, but thеn lose соntасt wіth іt? What dо we dо whеn wе are at the сhесkоut аnd fіnd Sоul Lоvе соnnесtіоn wіth аnоthеr реrѕоn? Start a соllесtіоn?

Rераіrіng a Dаmаgеd Rеlаtіоnѕhір – Reconnecting Sоul-Lоvе – The Eѕѕеnсе of Great Relationships


Sоul lоvе іѕ реrfесt, we саn feel іt аt a раrtу, аt thе оffісе or whеrеvеr, but it іѕ nоt a mоtіvе. Soul-love іѕ nо rеаѕоn tо dо аnуthіng. In fасt, іf уоu hаvе tо ѕрlіt up wіth a раrtnеr, аll уоu dо is rеturn tо Soul lоvе for thеm, and thеrе’ѕ nо attachment аt all. This is bоth a  ѕtаtе оf healing аnd оnе оf соnnесtіоn.

Wаntіng ѕоmеthіng mоtіvаtеѕ uѕ. Lоѕіng something hurts uѕ. But Sоul-lоvе іѕ a vасuum іn whісh there іѕ no mоtіvе. We don’t want anything, nееd аnуthіng, desire аnуthіng. Sо, the motive tо marry ѕоmеоnе is nоt bесаuѕе wе hаvе a Soul Love соnnесtіоn to them, because wе саn hаvе a thоuѕаnd, million, bіllіоn реорlе wе hаvе Sоul Lоvе connection to.

Wе mаrrу реорlе bесаuѕе wе hаvе Soul Love соnnесtіоn tо thеm AND because we hаvе trust, admiration, аррrесіаtіоn and vіѕіоn fоr thе futurе wіth thеm.

In mаrrіаgе we саn often lоѕе оnе оr аll оf those іmроrtаnt rеlаtіоnѕhір іngrеdіеntѕ, but wе саn never lоѕе Sоul Lоvе fоr a person. And thіѕ іѕ a rеаllу іmроrtаnt awareness in rеlаtіоnѕhір. Onсе уоu fееl thе соnnесtіоn, іt lasts fоrеvеr.

Sure, Soul Love can bесоmе fоggеd wіth ѕtrеѕѕ, anger, аnd buѕу-nеѕѕ, and ѕurе, Sоul Love is no penultimate reason to stay in a relationship whеrе the оthеr fоur іngrеdіеntѕ are mіѕѕіng, but, if you are gоіng tо рlасе one thіng, between you аrе уоur partner аѕ absolute and ѕасrеd, place Sоul Lоvе wау аbоvе the rеѕt.

To fееl Soul Love for a реrѕоn, male or fеmаlе іѕ a great connection аnd it hаѕ nоthіng tо do with causing оr killing romance.

Soul Love is bу far the mоѕt іmроrtаnt lеvеl оf соmmunіоn bеtwееn twо іndіvіduаlѕ. Without it, rеlаtіоnѕhірѕ аrе соmрlеx and emotionally unѕtаblе.

It is even mоrе іmроrtаnt to асknоwlеdgе this Soul Love connection whеn оnе оr both реорlе in a relationship аrе struggling wіth соmmіtmеnt. Thе аbіlіtу to lеt a реrѕоn ѕріn аnd ѕеаrсh their heart for аррrесіаtіоn, truѕt, аdmіrаtіоn аnd hоре fоr the future, that ability to ѕtаnd in ѕtіllnеѕѕ wіthоut rеасtіоn can bе fоund in thе сарасіtу tо асknоwlеdgе a Sоul Lоvе соnnесtіоn tо a раrtnеr thаt саn nеvеr fade.

Sоmеtіmеѕ wе gеt ѕсаrеd. Sometimes wе get jealous. Sоmеtіmеѕ wе еvеn gеt resentful оf our раrtnеr. These are nоt because оf Soul Lоvе connection but bесаuѕе оf emotional аttасhmеntѕ. Thеу аrе a раrt of thе ѕtrugglе to be humаn in relationship, but they are nоt a rеflесtіоn оf the dерth of уоur Sоul Lоvе.

Mаnу реорlе tell mе thаt the mоrе thеу love thеіr partner thе more jеаlоuѕ thеу bесоmе. Thіѕ is іnассurаtе. Thе more we fееl Sоul Lоvе for оur раrtnеr, thе mоrе wе can relax. Thеу can соmе оr go, leave or ѕtау, іt will nоt mаttеr іf your соnnесtіоn wіth them іѕ bаѕеd іn Soul Lоvе.

Rераіrіng a Dаmаgеd Rеlаtіоnѕhір – Reconnecting Sоul-Lоvе – The Eѕѕеnсе of Great Relationships
The real Essence

The Rеаl Eѕѕеnсе

Sоmе people think thаt Sоul Lоvе іѕ exclusive. Thаt wе hаvе thіѕ еxреrіеnсе with оnе реrѕоn, and еxсludе all others. Othеrѕ ѕtау ѕіnglе just ѕо thеу can hаvе аѕ mаnу оf thеѕе connections as lіfе permits.

It іѕ safe tо ѕау thаt wе need and want Sоul Lоvе соnnесtіоnѕ аnd іrrеѕресtіvе оf оur mоrаl оr social judgements аbоut іt, wе do have thеm wіth multiple people. Sо, there are оnlу twо important ԛuеѕtіоnѕ. Hоw dо we hаvе as mаnу of thеѕе moments with оur partner іnѕtеаd of bесоmіng “fаmіlіаr with the view?” And thе ѕесоnd ԛuеѕtіоn is, “Whаt dо wе dо whеn, whіlе іn a relationship, wе hаvе thеѕе соnnесtіоnѕ wіth оthеrѕ?”

Thе fіrѕt ԛuеѕtіоn іѕ the mоѕt dіffісult. How dо we ѕuѕtаіn mоmеntѕ of Sоul Lоvе connection wіth ѕоmеоnе we become familiar wіth оn аn еvеrуdау bаѕіѕ?

Cоnvеntіоnаl аttеmрtѕ tо sustain thеѕе Sоul Love moments with a раrtnеr include: gifts, hоlіdауѕ, babies, sex, romance, nеw hоmеѕ, picnics, роrnоgrарhу, self hеlр courses, tantra and theatre.

But еvеn these, оvеr аn еxtеndеd реrіоd саn bесоmе lіkе thе vіеw we оwn.

To undеrѕtаnd how tо hаvе mоrе Soul Lоvе соnnесtіоn mоmеntѕ wіth a раrtnеr, іt may be important tо understand thе mесhаnісѕ оf Sоul Lоvе еxреrіеnсеѕ.

Yоu аrе ѕіttіng at уоur dеѕk, the Sun іѕ shining іn thе sky, but уоu dоn’t lооk up аnd thіnk, wоw, thеrе’ѕ thе Sun. Yоu juѕt еnjоу thе dауlіght and nіght lіght (mооnlіght іѕ Sunlіght). Sometimes уоu see thе Sunrise оr Sunset and уоu mаrvеl аt the Sun. Sо, Sоul Lоvе іѕ Sunlіght. It’ѕ there 24/7 nеvеr mіѕѕіng. Without it we’d shrivel аnd bесоmе duѕt. However, wе dоn’t аlwауѕ thіnk about it.

There is love in SHARING

10 Things Broke Guys Normally Use To Entertain Female Visitors

I​ think I’m in the best position to come up with this kind of write-up. This is because I belong we know how to manoeuvre our way out when broke

NOTE: That a guy offers any of the aforementioned items does not necessarily mean it’s a yardstick for being broke, but most often than not, it’s one of those things we are talking about cheesy. This write-up contains exaggerations to a large extent cool
*Clear throat*

I shall discuss things broke guys normally use to entertain female visitors cheesy
10 Things Broke Guys Use To Entertain Female Visitor.

1. Gala and Soft drink 

Undoubtedly, gala and soft drink are what a proportion of broke guys normally use to entertain their female visitors

2. Egg-roll and Pure Water. 

Some of them will take their female visitor to an eatery and will go to the counter themselves and order for her, without even asking her what she would like to take or not. These kinds of dudes are most likely to order snacks such as egg-roll, meat pie, and soft drinks

3. Concotion Rice 

This reminds me of a time a lady visited me in school. Make I no lie, na N50 remain for my hand that day after buying a bottle of kerosene used to cook concotion rice. I inquired what I should offer her and said she had no appetite. I smiled to God for answering my prayers. After about three hours, she said I should get her shawama and I began to sweat profusely. I couldn’t but serve her my concotion rice

4. Viju Milk and Cabin Biscuit 

As funny as it sounds, some use it
5. Garri 

 funny as it sounds, I’m guilty of this. I have once offered garri to my female visitor. Make una no blame me ooooo, na my pocket empty that day ooooo cool

6. Malt 

Some will give her only malt without adding anything to it. They already assume she will not eat even if they offer her food, so dem no go kuku ask
7. Indomie and Egg 

Ronald4lif can bear me witness that he used to do this before his life changed for good

8. They offer Nothing 

For the broke ones who are very smart, will resort to entertain her by acting like clowns. However, they will start acting like Papa Ajasco so that the lady will laugh till she leaves
9. They Borrow Generator 

For those who have generation, they will borrow money to buy petrol, and for those who don’t have, they will borrow their friend’s generator. They will entertain her with movies 
10 Ladies, feel free to add the last one cool

There is love in SHARING

Signs She Enjoys Having S£x With You

Whether you have been together for years or you just started dating, it is important for you to know if you are both satisfied with your $ex lives.

You do not want to be so focused on your own
pleasure and disregard hers. So, are you really
that good in bed or is she hoping you get done
quickly so she can go to sleep?
Let’s find out by taking a look at the top 8
signs that proves she is having fun below.

1. She’s Wet: This is a no-brainer when it
comes to $exual pleasure. Just like a man gets
obviously aroused when he is ready, a
woman’s main arousal sign is that she is wet
down there. If she does not seem “ready”
prolong the pre-intimacy as much as you can and
make sure you are hitting the right spots. She
will thank you for it.

2. Quickening Breath : Another sign of arousal is
that her breath gets quicker and more urgent,
the more excited she gets. Watch for intense
gaze and steadily quickening breath, then you
know you’ve got her.

3. She Tightens Around You : If she seems to be
getting tighter around you as you go on, this is
a sign that she is enjoying what you are doing.
A woman having fun gets tighter and wetter as
she feels more pleasured.

4. Holds You (or something else) Tighter : Does
her grip on you seem to be getting tighter?
Does she seem to be grabbing the sheets or the
headboard like her life depends on it? A
woman in the throes of extreme pa$$ion
would have an intense urge to hold on tight.

5. Toes Curl: If you are keeping a closer eye on
your partner’s reactions, you would notice
that her toes curl in the moment of pleasure.

6. She Communicates : A partner who tells you
what she likes during $ex (verbally or via
body language) is definitely having a good
time and wants more. She would not waste her
time telling you what she wants if you were
not doing a pretty good job in the first place.

7. She Climaxes : The signs above could also tell
you that she is close to orgasm and if you feel
her reach that final release, then that is your
main proof. It is almost impossible for a
woman to climax without having reached the
ultimate peak of pleasure and desire.

8. Initiates $ex: One way a woman gets turned
on for $ex is when she remembers how great
it was the last time. It is this memory that
would lead her to approach you and request
for more good times. If she is always calling
you for more, or reaching for you even when
you are both watching TV, then she obviously
cannot get enough.

There is love in SHARING

10 Things Most Girls Do When Going To Meet Their Boyfriends

1. They wear a clean bra and panties (even those who hardly change bras) just for unforeseen events.
2. They tell their parents they are going to see ‘Chioma’.
3. They come much later than schedule (just to send a signal that they aren’t desperate, even though they actually are).

4. Naïve and first timers put on some weird undies at least to restrict or perhaps delay access to their….

5. At times their phones go dead (either intentionally or energy cut). This makes the guy feel hopeless.

6. If they actually don’t want s*x, they offer to prepare an endless meal or do house chores.
7. They put their phones on silent knowing fully well that their other boyfriends would dial. For those who don’t, they harass these poor dudes over the fone.
8. Sometimes, they show up unannounced to assess the guy’s level of hygiene or to catch a cheat.
9. They counter Sekxual advances by acting moody and try to get busy with a giant novel or seasonal movie.
10. The badoo girls just get down straight to business.

There is love in SHARING

#DearFutureHusband: I Won’t Cook For You Every Day


It’s only by grace I am alive today. I have been depressed lately. I have worried a lot and wonder why I was not told growing up is difficult. I have also concluded that the most miserable stage of almost everyone’s life is between the time they complete school, do national service and get a job.

I have been thinking about marriage a lot. It means I have been thinking about you a lot too. My friend Louis says, girls usually think about marriage at this time because they do not have jobs. They totally forget about marriage when they get jobs. As to whether this is true, I can’t tell. But I hope it is not because I never want to forget about you.

One morning, while I continued my pondering about what life after National Service holds for me, Whatsapp notifications from one of my numerous groups distracted me. My friend, James, had posted his wedding invitation in the group. The invitation was not the cause of the mayhem in the group. I tell you what was.

Prior to when James posted the invitation, we discussed marriage and relationship issues and he mentioned that he would never eat food stored in the fridge. He added that the woman who would eventually settle down with him must cook fresh food every day. That did not go down well with a lot of the ladies in the group, including me. I was like, “For real!?… Like E-V-E-R-Y—D-A-Y? In Kwame Nkrumah’s Ghana?”

Based on his earlier assertion, members of the group wanted to know if his soon to be wedded wife would cook fresh food for him every day. People bombarded him with questions from all angles. Guess what? He couldn’t answer. To me, it meant one thing. He would not in a thousand years get his wife to do such a preposterous thing. Shaking my head. Some guys are all talk. Absolutely nothing give them.

Boo-boo, I was mute when this discussion went on. I enjoyed watching on as the other ladies “gave it to him well well”. How can you expect your wife to cook fresh meals for you every day? Who does that? My Brown Sugar, I am by this letter informing you that if you think like James, repent before our paths cross. Otherwise… I leave the rest to your imagination.

We will not cook fresh food in our home EVERY DAY.

Now, let’s get this straight. I am more than ready to cook for you, my champ. However, I do not think it is possible for me to hit the kitchen every day to prepare a new meal for you. That is impossicant – completely off whatever list of marriage fantasies you may be dreaming about.

I will be working 8 to 5, just like you. Or, I could be doing more hours. This, notwithstanding, will not stop me from ensuring that you are properly feed – to your satisfaction and healthily. I take it as my duty and I promise to do it to perfection. So, help me, God.

I find it more prudent to dedicate Saturdays and Sundays to cooking all kinds of meals and storing them in the fridge towards the week. On week days, when I get home, I will ensure that the food is properly warmed for the both of us and we shall eat enjoyably. With this, even if I am away, you can sort yourself out easily. Works for me. Works for you. Win-Win.

Cooking in bulk saves a lot of time and energy. It saves a lot of money too. Imagine that I prepare fresh stew or soup every day. That is quite expensive!  And stressful! Apart from the fact that I will not put myself through that, you don’t want to consider asking me to do such a thing.

Of course, there’s an exception to everything. It is not every meal I can cook and store in the fridge. Obviously, I can’t boil slices of yam and pack them in the fridge because I want to save myself from stress. Something like that, I am willing to prepare every day. There are the special occasions too and the days you do not, perhaps, feel like eating any of the meals we have in store. I am more than willing to compromise on such days. I know you will do same for me. That’s all marriage is about. Compromises.

According to James, his mum never feed him “leftovers”. She brought him up like that till her passing. Since then, he has not adjusted. Currently, he gives money to his siblings to cook for him every evening or he goes out to eat on days they decide not to cook for him. The annoying and sad part of James’ situation is that he does not know how to cook. Can you imagine that? Mtcheeeew!

I hope my future mother-in-law does not bring you up like James. Otherwise, I hope when you read this letter, you will start changing your mind. Changing your mind about eating freshly cooked meals every day is but one minor condition you must satisfy before we end up together. As you may already know (that is, if you read any of my letters), first, find God and find yourself. You must be a SANTACLAUSIAN, be left-handed and hate kokonte with passion. And, you must be a born in July.

All hope is not lost of you do not meet all the above requirement. The only one cast in stone is being SANTACLAUSIAN. Even that, if you can assure me that our boys will attend Adisadel College, I am fine. You see, I am not a difficult lady at all.

In case you are wondering why I am obsessed about that Adisco, look for my cousin, Jerry, and ask him. He is one of the reasons I love that school and its boys and I love them very much. I have even learned their school anthem.

OK, Chunks, do not get distracted. I wrote this letter to tell you that I will not cook fresh meals for you every day.

Until we find each other…

Your love,

There is love in SHARING

Safer Ways To End A Broken Relationship

Ending a relationship is never easy. But having the courage to follow through with your decision will make both you and her happier when the relationship has already passed its “best before” date. Be true to your emotions and do what’s best for you and her, here are the early signs of a broken relationship .

Relationships often go bad — and stay that way. Even when both parties know that they would be happier with someone else, it’s human nature to procrastinate about difficult decisions. So rather than riding inertia’s wave, use these tips to end the relationship and move on.

Make Her The First To Know

Out of respect for her, never tell your friends you’re going to break up before telling her it’s over. It’s a simple thing women consider sacred. The all too connected grapevine is not the place she should or deserves to be told that you’re no longer interested. You could discuss some relationship problems you’re having with your friends,  ut your final decision to break up with her should remain private.

Use your judgment to decide which day would be best to break the news to her. If she’s very emotional and you think that you’ll break her heart, try to do it on a Friday. This will give her the weekend to recover and spend time with friends. But if she’s the type to plow through full steam ahead, then perhaps Monday would be best. This will ensure that her busy workweek will keep her mind off the breakup and you.

Remember that there will be no “perfect time” to end the relationship. The best thing to do is set a random Monday or Friday to break up — and stick to it.

Find A Neutral Environment

Know and remember that it’s not fair to end the relationship at your place, and neither should you be forced to see a picture on her fridge of you and her hugging. Try to find a neutral place where both of you would be comfortable to express your feelings, like at a park. At least there you can walk and talk, or maybe even find a more secluded spot.

A restaurant, on the other hand, is a bad choice. If she makes a scene, there’s no respectful recovery and no quick way out. However, fear of embarrassment is never a reason to leave her in the middle of nowhere. No matter how emotional and heated the conversation gets, there’s no excuse for risking her safety or yours.

End It In Person

If you’ve lost that loving feeling, be courteous and tell her face-to-face. Phone calls and e-mail are fine for small talk, but this is a big issue. It’s natural to want as much distance as possible between you and her when you break the bad news, but in this case, fight your instincts and have the decency to say it to her face.

Keep It Simple

There’s no need to put her through the history of your decision to break up. She does deserve an explanation, but save her (and yourself) the long-winded reasons of exactly why and how things went sour. Be clear about the fact that you feel the relationship is at an end, but pepper that crystal-clear reality with a significant dose of regret.

It’s important to let her know that the decision to split up is difficult for you too. By letting this be known, you make a soon-to-be-ex-girlfriend a friend in mutual sorrow. Don’t say you’re going to call if you’re not going to. Part of keeping it simple also includes ending it smoothly — be fair to both you and her.

If you’re unclear about how you’re ending it with her, it could result in a dragged out breakup. Don’t break up in stages — if you want to sever the ties, there’s no time like the present.

Let Her See Your Point Of View

Who can argue with logic? You’re probably not the only one that has been feeling the relationship going downhill. A dose of reality might be just what the doctor ordered to get her to accept what it is you need to say and do about it. A good way to get her to understand why the two of you aren’t best-suited for one another is through a simple example. But make sure you get her to start the ball rolling.

Ask her if she has been feeling the lag in your relationship. She’ll probably have quite a few examples about why things haven’t been working out. Letting her talk it through will help her see why you brought the topic up in the first place.

Don’t Change Your Mind

There’s a big reason why you made the decision to confront her with the end of your relationship. She may argue, cry or even “not understand why you’re doing this,” but be sure and stick to your guns. There’s nothing worse than a flip-flop relationship — you’re either in or you’re out. So make sure you have rebuttals for all her potential comebacks.

Be Ready For Tears

Whether she’s glad you said something or not, chances are tears will be shed. Ending a relationship can bring intense emotion and she’s not about to save you from seeing it all pour out at once. When she does start to cry, be sympathetic but don’t be drawn in by an overflow of powerful emotion. Be an emotional rock. If your new ex is the stoic type (saving her emotions for a later time when you’re not around), don’t try to cajole a reaction from her. Let her be and tell her that you’re ready to talk when she is.

Make sure to have plans set with friends later that day. This will ensure that the breakup process isn’t dragged on longer than necessary and that you’re not alone if you feel bad about what just happened. Don’t be one of those guys who wants to prove one last time that he cares by breaking off his plans with his friends; that’s amateur stuff.


There is love in SHARING

Can Cheating Be Healthy For A Relationship?

Before you move in the direction of your disloyal ambitions, consider the consequences it could have on not only the relationship you’ve built, but your confidence and the self-esteem of your partner. Here, we present a closer look at what cheating actually does to a couple:

What Happens When You Cheat?

As Dr. Mann noted, the part of your relationship that takes the most brutal force is your trust. This vital bone of any couplehood is what glues you together, makes you feel comfortable, and encourages you to be vulnerable together. Without it, the love you once shared is severely endangered, says Los Angeles-based psychologist Dr. Yvonne Thomas, Ph.D. “When trust gets significantly damaged, emotional and physical intimacy can become infrequent or non-existent, and a multitude of upsetting feelings such as anger, resentment, jealousy, insecurity, hurt, and/or sadness can cause disconnection,” she explains.

Another big way cheating impacts an otherwise happy couple is by fracturing your bond, begging you to question not only your past and your present, but your future, according to psychotherapist Crystal Bradshaw. “When a partner steps outside of the agreement or the contract of a monogamous relationship, the hurt partner’s own identity comes into question. ‘Was I not enough?’ The hurt partner also begins to not trust themselves, their intuition, and their decision-making process,” she explains.

This is why a gut check before heavily flirting or sleeping with someone else is essential — you’re not only toying with your Facebook relationship status, but the emotional well-being of another person, a person you love and are committed to making happy. “Cheating can do enormous damage to the self-esteem of the person who has been cheated on. It can make a person doubt their attractiveness, their performance in bed, and their desirability. It can wreak havoc on one’s sense of self,” Dr. Mann adds.

Why Do Some People Cheat in Hopes of Changing the Relationship?

Dr. Mann explains that it’s rare for a person to believe that being unfaithful might actually improve their relationship; rather, thoughts of infidelity are almost always a sign of underlying trouble in the relationship. “The number one reason why people cheat is a lack of connection in the relationship. Most people do not realize how important creating, maintaining, and nurturing connection in a relationship is. There will always be temptations, but when a couple is feeling connected, the odds of acting on those temptations go down significantly,” she explains.

And it’s not the allure of someone sexy or irresistible, but rather, a disconnect of feelings. While sexual adventures might be interesting and enticing at the start, when people start to look for love elsewhere, it’s not about making love. It’s about feeling intimate from an emotional standpoint, according to Dr. Mann. “Studies show that only 7 percent of cheating women and 8 percent of cheating men cheated due to sexual dissatisfaction. The vast majority cheated either because a lack of emotional connection in the relationship or a combination of a lack of emotional and sexual connection in the relationship,” she adds.

Bradshaw continues, noting that sometimes you might feel the urge to explore other pastures because you’re trying to make your partner change, a quest that, for most, will end with disappointment. And other times, cheating happens at random, indicating a need for more self-evaluation and reflection outside of the bounds of a relationship. “Cheating can be a way to get a partner’s attention and to facilitate the change they seek. For others, an affair can be a way to exit the relationship. Some people cheat and it has nothing to do with their partner. Happy people in happy relationships cheat. People who have no intention of ending their relationship, who deeply love their partners and they life they have created together, cheat,” she explains.

In other words, it can always happen — but how do you prevent it? And what do you do if you were unfaithful?

Can It Ever Work?

This question is an easy one, according to Dr. Mann: cheating is never, ever a good idea. Ever. But if it happens, it’s an important crossroads to pass through with someone you love and cherish, to determine if the relationship is worth working on or if it’s time to part ways. “Sometimes a crisis where a couple thinks they may lose each other makes them realize how much they value one another and inspires them to fight for the relationship. Sometimes cheating allows a couple to reassess their relationship and discover the flaws that led to the cheating. When they are both able to look at how they have contributed to the problems in the relationship and then address it, ideally with therapy, relationships can be turned around. When couples are willing to do that kind of work on their relationship, it can result in a deeper, more meaningful relationship between the two,” she explains.

Bradshaw echoes this sentiment, explaining that many couples are able to improve their relationship following the aftermath of an affair, but that it’s not the right way to provoke change or transformation because it takes a significant amount of time. And most of the time, the memory will never be completely erased. “An affair should not be the chosen catalyst to improve a relationship. Affair recovery takes a long time, it’s not something you bounce back from in a few months. The remnants of the affair will remain with you forever. When you have an affair, you make that part of your couple’s history and you have to find a way to incorporate that pain into the story of your relationship,” she explains. “A couple who is going through a crisis of an affair often find themselves having conversations they’ve never had before. Conversations that have needed to take place but never did. They will engage with each other in ways they haven’t engaged in for years, or even ever.”

What To Do if You’re Tempted

What’s the one trick that can prevent you from making a mistake you can’t take back? Bradshaw offers one word: communication. If you’ve already tried that route and feel like you’re hitting up against a wall over and over, it might be time to seek professional help in the form of therapy. And if your partner isn’t up to it? Go alone. “Sometimes you can implement the desired change within a relationship by doing your own work. Perhaps your partner will attend after you have a few sessions under your belt, or maybe through your solo work you can explore what you are getting out of the relationship and assess if it’s one you wish to stay in,” she recommends.

There is love in SHARING

7 Early Signs Of A Broken Relationship

When a relationship is on its last leg and a breakup is inevitable, who ends it? Recognising that her habits have become annoying instead of cute is just the start. Her rude mobile phone calls mid-meal, the way she thinks she’s always right and her complete lack of respect for your opinion should all be sending you a clear message.

A lot of people find it hard to face reality sometimes and admit that their relationship is over, especially if they’ve been stuck in an unhealthy union for so long.

If you and your partner are not happy with each other, a breakup might be an intelligent option for both of you to consider, because it’s really not worth it to remain in a relationship that’s not working.

Some of the many ways to know that your relationship, as you know it, has neared its final lap:

  • Constant Fighting:There’s no perfect relationship, but constant fighting is not healthy in any way. It’s okay if you fight once in a while, but when you and your partner fight everyday, even over minor or inconsequential things, it’s time to say goodbye to your relationship or look for smart ways to stop the endless fighting. Find out the reason of your fights: money, female friends or job. If you realize you two are constantly fighting for no apparent reason, your relationship may well be over.

  • No More Calls/Text: In the beginning of relationship, the partners used to call and text to each other several times a day. They would send romantic messages and gifts. But after a while, they are rather too busy to call or even a text. When one calls the other, they don’t have any second to say how much he/she miss the other. They never text back as well. That’s a clear sign that he/she is not interested anymore.

  • Always Busy: Of course, there are times when your partner may be very busy and you are not supposed to disturb. But if he/she is always busy, then it’s just a ready-made excuse. It’s easier to say ‘I’m busy’ than to spend the whole evening and night with a person you don’t love anymore. Find out if your partner is actually very busy, it’s not difficult to check.

  • Lost Of Interest: If you don’t want to spend time with your partner, you stop loving his/her jokes and touches. Just let your partner know that you want to end the relationship. They both have rights to know. If you think of meeting another guy/lady while dating your partner, what are you waiting for? Don’t waste your partner’s time! Honesty and respect are the things that you should never forget about, no matter what.

  • Forgetting Special Occasions: If your partner forgets your birthday, it’s a sad experience. Maybe, you don’t expect expensive gifts and a large bouquet of flowers, but you do expect your partner to show you how much he loves you and cares about you. If he/she forgets all special occasions, including your birthday, it’s clear that he/she doesn’t care about you anymore. Move on!

  • Nothing To Talk About:Remember when you first started your relationship, you could talk all night long without any awkward silences. Now, you don’t have anything to talk about. You spend a lot of time fighting over trifles and you rarely talk about your love and your future family and kids. If you don’t know how to start a conversation with your partner or he doesn’t want to talk to you because he is always busy, it’s a RED FLAG.

  • Mistakenly Calling You Another Name: If your partner has some female friends, it may not be as bad as you think. If he talks about them all day long, though, it’s time to find out more information about his new female friend. The worst thing is when he confuses names and calls you another name (and it happens more than once).

There is love in SHARING

3 Things That Crash Marriages

It is quite unfortunately that most people get obsessed with weddings, forgetting that this is the simple part, the difficult part is what comes after all the wedding buzz.

Marriage is no easy walk.

Most people just rush into marriages for the fun of it, they want to show off at the wedding, be envy of they friends but these are no reasons to get married.

A beautiful wedding does not necessarily mean a beautiful marriage.

These days, it is even more difficult to get past the big wedding into a successful marriage.

Broken marriage

Broken marriage

Here are three reasons why marriages do not always work out in this day and age.

1. Lack of sex: With all technology around us, sex is almost a thing of the past, hence the recent advertisement of Durex urging people to switch off their phones in order to reconnect with their partners. Besides, we all desire physical connection, so how does cutting that off lead you to believe your marriage will be successful? Instead, we have sex once every couple weeks, or when it’s time to get pregnant. It becomes this chore. This disinterest/lack of sex is a reason why marriages break up.

2. Finance mismanagement: These days, the cost of living is considerably higher, especially after most people spend a lot of money  n the wedding, this leads to problems in the marriage.

3. Technology: This is something that should help us if used properly, but because it aids disconnection, it also causes marriages to break up. Let’s face it, the last time you “spoke” to the person you love, you didn’t even hear their voice. There’s no physical connection attached to anything anymore. We’ve removed human emotion from our relationships, and we’ve replaced it with colorful bubbles.

All of the above are just some of the reasons why marriages break up in this century.

I’ll also recommend this article:7 Excuses Women Give For Not Being In A Relationship

There is love in SHARING