Friday evening found me in a position I’d come to know well: staring at my ceiling, taking stock of my life and not liking the results.
“Hmm, I think I did well today”, I said to myself. The morning never seems so promising, I thought losing my turn that morning was the last for the day. Sam had her 100% attention, I was left standing alone, greeting my other colleagues, saying “hi” wasn’t much fun for a day like this. All I wished was walking up to her and starting all over again like I was seeing her for the first time. Just this time, I will be the one saying “hi” first.
My thoughts were cut short when the course supervisior and a park of group captains and sub captains led the way to the temporary venue we’d use for the day. ” Shet! I can’t believe I’ll ever receive lectures in this hall again”, I thought, as I made my way gently to the top floor of the complex where the lecture was set to hold for the day.
I found myself a seat at the back of the class as usual. “Hmm, first day of resumption and I can’t even change sitting position”, I said in my mind, I’ve not been much of a serious student the previous class, I had been a lone quiet backbencher. ” I can’t really believe I’m doing this again”, I said to myself. My imaginations and thoughts were interrupted by Chichi, one of the girls I spent my holiday chatting with. “Ola”, she said as she walked towards the front of the lecture room. I couldn’t even reply before she zoomed off. ” Well, it’s all good jare”, I said to myself.
Throughout the lecture, I was stalking her. Watching her every move, every dude or babe she spoke to. I was busy thinking of what to say just in case I get another opportunity to speak to her. ” I must make a good impression”, I thought to myself. The lecture was a long and boring one, I could barely make a sentence. The public address system was not available and as expected the noise was to much for interested backbenchers like me to hear clearly.
Finally the boring lecture ended. I stood up to adjust my tie and ensure my shirt was still as smooth as ever. I waited patiently for her to walk my way so I can make the so called good impression. Before I knew it, while I was a little distracted complimenting my guys, she was already with Sam again. “This time I must not retreat so fast”, I said to myself. I approached them, greeted my guy and with a smile I said “hi” to her. I wasn’t even worried about what they were discussing. I finally had the opportunity of getting her to tell me what she’s been up to, how she likes my new haircut and co. Well, the whole sweet moment was interrupted by my roommate, it was time to return to the hostel. I said goodbye with hopes of chatting with her later at night. “Hmm, I think I did well today”, I said to myself as matched back to the hostel.
It’s the first day of lecture for the semester, like a primary school pupil, I’ve been anticipating. I woke up as early as 4am, I ironed my new pack shirt or is it corporate shirt. I was really optimistic, “today is gonna be a good day” I said as I pick a new pant trouser from my box. My noise and movement woke my roommates. They couldn’t help but ask if I was okay. Me in my mind was really excited but it seems to them I needed a therapy.
With the help of a fashionista so called roommate, the Senator himself, I picked a perfect tie to match the whole supposed corporate dressing. I rushed to the bathroom, had my bath, brushed my teeth like I was going to kiss the crown princess of England that morning. “Hmm, I think I’m good to go” I said to myself as I await one of my sluggish roomie to fix his tie properly.
LIke a gentleman full of life I walked out of the hostel with my roommates, me I kuku like group walk, I tried not to walk too fast like soldiers embarking on a rescue mission. Few meters from the lecture area, I could see my most of my mates outside waiting for further instructions on the exact lecture venue as the supposed regular venue was being used by our senior colleagues for examination.
As expected, I found my place in the crowd of wonderfully dressed dudes and babes, abi women de ni. Then the unexpected happened, I saw her, approached me. All the rehearsed compliments lines vanished in a moment. I was blank, speechless and dumbfounded. I tried to act like I didn’t notice her presence but my pretence was soon exposed. “You look good, really nice tie” she said. With a less appreciative tone I replied “thanks”. “Shet! I was going to say that first” I thought in my now far confused mind.
- I was so lost, not sure of what else to do do. I stretched my hand to shake her, I had imagined a hug, it’s been a while. You look good first greeting, she was polite enough to respond as expected. “Soft skin, she has changed a lot. Hmm” I thought. Then that my good friend with probably the best fashion sense appeared. Sam. The very guy that knows my predicament, even offered to help and is actually worsening my afflictions. Well as expected, her attention was swiftly shifted to him. That very moment I knew I had lost my turn that morning. Maybe I’ll try later. “Stupid boy, always spoiling my paro”, I thought in my broken hearted mind.
This second part of the ‘Wrong Meat’ trilogy is dedicated to the memory of a man who knew me basically all my life till he departed sadly from this land. He taught me English Language between 2003 and 2006, when I was in upper primary at TOPP Preparatory School.
The man I speak of, the late Emil Kofi Asempapa, once told my class a story. It is that tale I have adapted for this episode of the trilogy. Enjoy.
“Koo Shortingo, medaase!”, he grinned widely. He had given his victim-to-be that name because of his short stature. Then Gyau sprang into action!
“But Kweku, we met not too long ago… it’s not even up to a fortnight. Besides, I don’t think it’s right.”
“Her too-know all, I dey spoil der. Hard-core girl my foot!” he said in his head.
He had done something pretty awful and guilt sat not on his chest but inside his brain. His subconscious demanded reparations. What he had done, he could not undo. The repercussions going into this marriage were dire, but confession was out of the question. The only way out for him was to run; escape this ceremony, save himself and more importantly save Linda from the shame and the pain of his actions. He had to run.
“I’m sorry”, Koku whispered, took a step back from Linda and turned to leave.
It was the biggest and best day in his academic and professional life. He would be honoured as an associate professor at the DoRight University and he would give his inaugural “professorial” lecture. “Professor Hiram Ansah”. His new nomenclature was music to his ears, especially the way his wife, Bertha, said it.
Hiram and Andrews were friends from high school. They had always been close. However, Hiram was always jealous of his friend. Andrews was better than the former in everything.
In a spin of fortunes, Hiram’s life took a better turn at the expense of his friend’s misfortune. He became the star boy in the university, hooked up with Bertha after she left Andrews and now he was on the brink of taking Andrews’ dream. Despite things turning around for him, he had to carry the guilt of what he did to his best friend. He could not bring himself to confessing what he did to Andrews.